Sexy Roadside Assistance

It was a bright sunny Sunday afternoon, when you were standing on a busy metropolitan street. The cool breeze and radiating warmth of the sun reflects off my Nissan, its gloss bounces off the clean paint and repels all across the city streets with a sparkle. The fall of dead leaves brushes up a mini-storm as they flutter and flail about you, interfering with your concentration as you looked in the trunk for jumper cables.

“Beep-beep” you hear as the Kia lights in front of you flash and the doors unlock. Glancing over the top of your trunk lid you notice the sexiest dirty blonde you have ever seen about to enter her car. She feigns a smile in your direction as she as you “Do you need some help?” Working up a faint smile yourself you softly stutter as a Lexus buzzes by, “no, no thanks, I got this” Well ok, if you are sure, have a good one.” She states as she jumps in her ride, waits for a passing Lincoln and Jeep and speeds off into the distance leaving your hopes dashed and your butt still stranded.

After a hard day of fitting tires in the tire shop, the side of the road is the last place you want to be. As you day dream a bit more about the dream girl that just left you behind you hear the load rev of a Honda and an Audi. Staring lustfully you notice they both have spectacular 18-inch rims and sleek sports tires. As they both rev up at the light their tires spin off in a cloud of smoke. Screaming past a Toyota, they disappear in the distance.

Pulling out your phone in frustration, you look up your list of contacts and come up with a friend to call. “Thank God!” You think to yourself. But just as you reach to dial that number, the screen goes blank and you realize the battery’s dead. A BMW pulls up and parks behind you, with a tidy businessman rushing out and heading in towards a nearby office building. “Excuse me, sir!” You call out, but he ignores you and proceeds into the building.

With the wind taken from your sails you sit on the fender of your car and begin to sulk. Life goes on around you as a couple SUV’s, a Chevrolet, a Lamborghini and a very nice Lotus with brand new quality tires pass you by. You hang your head in jealousy that these guys are on their way home and you are not.

Out of nowhere you see a bright red Ford fly by and make a U-turn. As the woman pulls up next to you, she honks the horn. It’s the same woman you saw earlier. Sweet! “Hey a was just picking up the kids in my husband’s car, I noticed you were still in need of some help” You thank her as your car revs and then begins to idle. As you close the hood and she drives off into the distance you think “so much for that”

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